Having lived together for more than a dozen years, not many are solved for parting, but the divorce after 50 is not so rare. What pushes people who know each other who have passed through a lot to such a cardinal step?
Possible causes of divorce after 50
Most often, a woman becomes the initiator of the divorce up to 50 years old, and in adulthood, the desire for men is usually changed in adulthood. However, the reimbursions may arise from any of the spouses. The most common options:
- "Sedna in the beard, the demon in the edge." Provocates parting here more often a man who wants to realize himself with a woman's love. Psychologists justify such a behavior to the desire to assert themselves, to prove their worthwesiest.
- Alcoholic dependence of one of the spouses, more often husband. Financial problems, quarrels, severe psychological situation are usually joined. A woman who has long hoped for the best or humbled with problems for the sake of children, at this age allows himself to part with the illusions, do not look around for the opinions of independent already siblings and submits for divorce.
- Marriage for calculating with a big difference in age. When there is no attachment and feelings, it is not surprising that a younger spouse refuses to spend your life in care of the aged.
- "Empty nest". Sometimes, when the grown children begin to live their lives and the opportunity arises to stop, think, to live for themselves, the spouses suddenly understand that they only tied the common offspring, no other common interests, feelings have long been cooled and living together simply makes no sense.
Causes can be different, but, unfortunately, divorce by mutual agreement and at this age is rare. One spouse is usually discouraged by the news and is in confusion, it is wondering what to do after the divorce, because the way of life change after 50 is much more difficult than in youth.
How to cope with experiences
- Take the decision of the spouse or spouse. It is worth come true with the fact of divorce, it is not rational to spend the forces on attempts to return everything back, more often at this age people make decisions weighted, not on emotions.
- Allow yourself to express all negative emotions: sadness, disappointment, offense, fear. Do not store negative in yourself. Want to cry, beat the dishes? Forward, this is normal in this situation.
- Do not refuse the help of friends, relatives or psychologist. They can offer what is especially necessary now - the ability to speak.
- Talk to children. Tell them everything without accusations towards the spouse or spouse. Do not hide emotions, but do not set up children against your father or mother, thereby the problem only will be aggravated.
- Take all your free time. Take care of anything: sports, creativity, hobby so that there is no minute for regret.
- Do not pretend that everything is fine, if it is not. Urgently acquire new relationships too incorrect. It is better to try to keep good relationships with a spouse or spouse, without being stunned to prove that without him or her everything is fine.
- Transform. Sport, hairdresser, education - lift yourself self-esteem.
- Remember, everything will pass, time treats, and these experiences will remain behind, the more, that the divorce is also the opportunity to make your life better.
Medals have two sides
Imagine, you fell a chance to try to live differently, perhaps you did not think about this opportunity for 50 years, and this is really a gift. After all, now you can live as you want only to you, listen to yourself, not to adapt to other people's interests, coming at this time on your own. Being a egoist sometimes worth it when it means to live in his pleasure, to love yourself really, to do, finally, what there was no time, money, forces before.
50 years old - not old age, there is already experience, there is still strength, health and attractiveness. All roads are open. Fear, misunderstanding, how to start live - the right signs of exit from the comfort zone, but it was there that the borders of the "house" were attached to new opportunities and quite likely, very soon you will tell the former spouse or a spouse for this wonderful chance.
